4 ways I can help my child with Sensory Processing Difficulties be part of a sporting team

Team sport comes with so many wonderful benefits for our children, not just during childhood but for years to come! Many of us have some great memories of being part of a team & community bigger than ourselves. There is also no doubt some hard lessons learnt about how to be a good teammate, be a gracious loser or work hard towards a common goal. It’s also often a place of friendship filled with stories of camaraderie and joy.

Unfortunately, sport can be a minefield for our kids with Sensory Processing difficulties. There is such an influx of unpredictable sound, touch, movement and visual input that it is very easy to dip into sensory overload! That is before we’ve even thrown in the social and physical demands that it comes with. In my work as a Paediatric Occupational Therapist, I often hear the words “it just doesn’t work”. Or “we just can’t find a good fit that doesn’t result in terrible meltdowns or behavioural outbursts!”. So what can we do to make sure our kids really do find a place of belonging where they can learn to love movement? Here is my advice:

1. PREP, PREP, PREP and then PREP some more.

This one is not rocket science however it can be the difference between a successful session or one that ends in tears. Preparation takes away some of the unpredictability of sensory input and it can help us feel more calm, regulated and able to cope with some of the other challenges with more ease. I could write a whole article on how to prepare our kiddos but in a nutshell, once you’ve chosen the team you want to be part of, make sure you prep your child by:

  • Taking them to the field/hall they’re going to before the first training session if you can. Show them what it is like in a quiet environment before it is invaded by kids. Talk them through the first steps when they arrive and what that might look like. Tell them where you will be or where their ‘safety point’ will be if they need to retreat. Respect and allow their need for time and space. Offering this is important for ALL kids, even the ones who may seem overly confident rather than anxious.

  • Show them photos of the environment and the people involved if you can.  If not, offer that they can watch the first session without participating so they can have a visual of what to expect.

  • Wear the uniform & shoes they will have to wear before they attend the session. This gives you time to see if there are tags to remove and the ability for your child to get used to the clothes before the nerves kick in.

 2. Manage your own emotions and expectations

Most of us enter these situations with our own ideas of what successful participation should look like and our own baggage about sport and group environments. Check-in with yourself about how you feel about what they “should” be doing and your own anxieties and fear of embarrassment in front of large groups of people. This is a time when your child is really going to need backup and unconditional acceptance about their journey and their experience. They can sense when we don’t approve of how they are participating and most of the time this just leads to further negative association with sport. Try and take a graded, strengths-based approach to the activity. If we start with participation in 1/10 tasks, that’s ok. Find the positive, persist and build on that.

3. Practice at home and focus on enjoyment and connection

Casually suggest that you practice at home in between training sessions. Keyword being “SUGGEST”. Not force or even continually suggest. Just mentioning it occasionally with language such as “Can you show me how to do that thing you practised at footy training?” With anything new that can be challenging for our kiddos, it’s important to focus on enjoyment and connection rather than demands and getting things perfect. We may have an idea of what a perfect pass, kick or throw looks like, but for the moment we are better off focusing on making it fun and doing it together rather than teaching.

4. Choose well, do your research and share with your coaches

It really pays to do your research before going. Is there a friend that is already a member of the team? Could you meet the coaches? Think about things like:

  • If you have a sensitive child, perhaps a super loud or intimidating coach is not the best idea. Similarly, an environment that is very unpredictable and uncontrolled could be a little much to handle. An outside space could be better than a hall that echoes.

  • If you have a child who tends to run away, perhaps a hall or a fenced space might be the right thing for you all to relax.

Think about what you could share with the coaches and remember that they can only provide assistance and adjust their style if they know what your child needs. Explaning that your child’s behaviour goes out the window if they’re challenged beyond their capabilities might be enough to help the coach look at it with different eyes. Mentioning that you are having some difficulties at home and school with x,y,z could be enough to encourage the coach to come to you and ask for help with helping your child succeed.

As a final reminder, do mention your goal of helping your child be part of a team to your Occupational Therapist or clinical team. We are here to help!

Good luck!!

Sense Rugby